On why Words just might Save the World, if only by trying.

Or,

'Endeavor' is my favorite word because it's the answer to everything.

Well, I did it again. I sat somewhere, pulled a little black book out of my pocket, borrowed a pen, and started scribbling, not because I wanted to , but because I had to. My God, it felt good, and here it is:

So. I was at home fuming
I was pissed until
I realized I was hurt.
I was a victim.
It took me a while.
I typed.

I love typing.
It makes me feel
important
accomplished
intact.
It makes me feel
like I have something
to say.
Until I look up.

I look at my fingers.
I can't type for shit.
I drag my shifts.
I mispell
completley
apparenteley
beautifil
I can spell with a pen, not
with my fingers.
Worse, I barrell forward
I can't see what I'm
Doing.
Only what I've
Done.
It's drivel
rave
anger
spit
& vinegar.
It's awful.

I posted it anyway,
then I drove.
I talk to myself behind the wheel.
I rant, I preach.
I have no disciples,
one disciple,
all the acolytes I could
ever
want
need
forgive.

Can I forgive them?
They don't seek it.
They are rightous
patriots
martyrs
idiots
madmen
simple men
men of faith
MADMEN.
Men.
Animals.

Bundles of instincts
with no where to go
but East
Down
to Hell that doesn't
Exist
to an Allah that who has
forgotten them, us
Everything.

But I'm just licking my wounds.
It's because I'm a victim.
We all are.

On the ACTUAL end of the world

Or

How lunatics killing each other make me feel humble for loving baseball.

A few days ago, I compared the Yankees to Al-Queda. They lost the World Series (to a team with less than 1/3 their payroll) and I'm glad about that.

Meanwhile, lunacy brings back the real point. In a God-forsaken place across the world,a suicide bomber strikes an Iraqi town, after another lunatic with a bomb blew up the headquarters of that insidious group, The Red Cross.

THE RED CROSS!!!!!!!!

How far out of hand have things gotten when people will kill other people, people just like them, people of flesh and blood, people with parents and pets and bills to pay, people who've had bad dates, people who've had their hearts broken, people who've seen the sun and smiled from time to time, other people just trying to live their lives? How bad has it gotten when people who are willing to help others, under a time honored symbol of peace and neutrality, people giving out food and medicine and blankets and hope become targets of lunatics? Once again, there are too few kind people, people of compassion and sanity in the world. Once again madness has overtaken someone, driven men to do the unspeakable to each other.

"Tonight the streets of Heaven are too full of Angels"

I wish I could believe that. The problem is that these people are doing all of this in the name of God, a God that's supposed to be universal between the three great religions that were born in the burning stretch of desert where this madness has taken root. A God that has likely turned its back on all of us, thrown in the towel and said "Screw it, you guys clearly don't get the point. Go ahead, Kill each other, who gives a shit?"

I deeply hope that's not the case.

I hope it's down on it's knees, weeping at what we have done in it's name. And I hope it knows I'm sorry for comparing baseball, something that has brought me great joy and an understanding of God just a little bit, to something insane that others have done in God's name.