It’s been a tough weekend, but overall a better one. Anything beats wallowing in my own regret and shame, like I did all last weekend and most of last week. Keeping it light has been the goal, do simple, enjoyable things, and try not to dwell. A good friend recently told me “You have to try to do the best you can with the things you can control, and not worry about the others.” Not easy advice to take, that. I can’t, in good conscience, just think solely about myself because I have many things to atone for right now, many wrongs to try and live up to, since I can’t make them right. But I can find some solace in the words of one of my heroes.
“The only way to live, as I see it, is to learn to love the little every day things, Like a cool drink of whiskey of an evening, or a glass of buttermilk, or say, the company of a feisty gentlemen like myself.”
Gus McCrae and I have spent a lot of time together, lately, and reading has been good for me.
Today, for me, it was book stores, hitting golf balls, and cooking. It still hurts, and it still hurts mostly because I hurt other people, but today, it’s a little better. Not a lot, but a little, and it will have to do for now.